As most of you know, I am on a journey of getting healthy. And this is a very good thing! Those who have known me for many years will know that, when it comes to me, I have some self-confidence issues, especially when it comes to my body. But that has been changing slowly as I have been getting healthier. Dropping 45+ piunds in under 6 months has been a big boost for me. So I have been getting more brave when it comes to doing the thing every single guy dreads.....talking to women!
This has always been something I have struggled with. Especially when it comes to asking someone on a date. So with this new self confidence in tow, I have been more active in talking to women around me, just in normal conversation, kind of practicing and building myself up. But something happened this week that has shot all that confidence back to zero.
I ran into an acquantiance here in town (and no, I will not be divulging any names, I respect this person more than that). We chatted for a little bit, as we had not seen each other in a while, and I casually said, "hey, we should grab a bite to eat sometime, maybe Mexican or Chineese." Very inocuous I thought. She looked me dead in the eye, and said, straight faced "Aren't you kinda fat to be asking me out?" I. Was. Floored!!!! I have had people call me big, fat , whatever before. And I get it, cause I know what I look like, but that went beyond cruel into a realm I did not know exsisted. So yeah, my confidence took a big hit.
Now, before anyone says anything bad, I understand, she is not worth my time. And that is true, no one deserves to be treated that way. And I have had several friends confirm that for me. But really? I mean come on. Look, ladies, you do not know how hard it is for a guy to ask you out. It is not easy at all! So at least be nice to us. We are trying. Maybe she had a bad day, maybe she just really didn't want to be nice, I don't know. remember, we are human beings too, and we have feelings!
Friday, October 25, 2013
Saturday, September 21, 2013
Adoption
I want to talk about ADOPTION. There is a reason for this. I have actually been thinking about it for a while. The reason? I feel like there have been three adoptions in my life, and I want to talk about them. May give you some insight into me, and who I am.
The first one, well, was a real adoption. My mom is really my mom (love her). But the person most thought of as my dad, well he was my adopted dad. My biological father, Tom (thus my middle name) gave me up when I was very young, or so I understand. When mom married Charles, he was kind enough to adopt me. May not seem like a big deal, but truthfully, it was. He and I have not always had the best of relationships, but I still think of him as my dad. And because of that, I also gained family that I love and treasure. Of course, I guess you could say that Winfred, my step-dad, kind of adopted me as well, even though I was an adult. Not an adoption in the truest sense, but he did take me in and consider me one of his own. Again, I gained family that I cherish.
The second, well that one should be obvious. the day God adopted me. I know I am not the greatest of people, am totally flawed, and make terrible decisions on what seems like a moment by moment basis, but He forgives me. My heavenly Father, well, honestly I would not be writing this right now if it were not for him. the last year and a half have at times been brutal on me. And I have struggled mightily. But He has been there with me every step of the way. It has not been easy. And it still isn't. but trials and struggles, I am happy to have them. (See James 1: 2-18. If you understand that, you'll understand me better.)
The third adoption, and one I have recently experience has been my church family. It has been so great, becoming a member at Green River Memorial Baptist. The people there have taken me in as one of their own, even though I am not a local native. They have loved me, supported me, gone out of their way to do things for me, fed me, the list is endless. And I cannot tell you just how thankful I am for them. it was a true blessing from god that led me there, and one I cannot ever be thankful enough for.
So there are the 3 adoptions in my life. Not sure if it makes who I am any clearer, but it was fun to write about!
The first one, well, was a real adoption. My mom is really my mom (love her). But the person most thought of as my dad, well he was my adopted dad. My biological father, Tom (thus my middle name) gave me up when I was very young, or so I understand. When mom married Charles, he was kind enough to adopt me. May not seem like a big deal, but truthfully, it was. He and I have not always had the best of relationships, but I still think of him as my dad. And because of that, I also gained family that I love and treasure. Of course, I guess you could say that Winfred, my step-dad, kind of adopted me as well, even though I was an adult. Not an adoption in the truest sense, but he did take me in and consider me one of his own. Again, I gained family that I cherish.
The second, well that one should be obvious. the day God adopted me. I know I am not the greatest of people, am totally flawed, and make terrible decisions on what seems like a moment by moment basis, but He forgives me. My heavenly Father, well, honestly I would not be writing this right now if it were not for him. the last year and a half have at times been brutal on me. And I have struggled mightily. But He has been there with me every step of the way. It has not been easy. And it still isn't. but trials and struggles, I am happy to have them. (See James 1: 2-18. If you understand that, you'll understand me better.)
The third adoption, and one I have recently experience has been my church family. It has been so great, becoming a member at Green River Memorial Baptist. The people there have taken me in as one of their own, even though I am not a local native. They have loved me, supported me, gone out of their way to do things for me, fed me, the list is endless. And I cannot tell you just how thankful I am for them. it was a true blessing from god that led me there, and one I cannot ever be thankful enough for.
So there are the 3 adoptions in my life. Not sure if it makes who I am any clearer, but it was fun to write about!
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Welcome to my new blog! After much thought on what the title should be, it finaly hit me. With turning 40 this year, life has turned out to look different than I thought it would. Not that that is a bad thing! Far from it actually. There is so much good in my life now that did not exsist 5 years ago, much less 10. And while what I have to say may be mundane or uninteresting to some, for me, it is an outlet. A way to express myself in words and get my thoughts out there.
Now, I will tell you, this will be random! there will be workout updates, thoughts on things I see in life, book and movie reviews, sports talk, just whatever floats into my head! I don't have a set schedule of when I will post, at least once a week I think. But who knows, it could be more!
To those who have encouraged me to do this, thank you so much! I know I was a pain when it came to finding a name, but I think it worked out!
It has been two years since my last post, one about the passing of my Grandmother. That was one tough blog to write! (this is my old blog, if you want to read my old writings http://tonsoftuba.blogspot.com/).
That is all for today. Feeling icky from allergies, but had a good cardio session this morning. headed to the house for breakfast, and college football! And looking forward to the church fish fry tomorrow. Have a good weekend all!
Now, I will tell you, this will be random! there will be workout updates, thoughts on things I see in life, book and movie reviews, sports talk, just whatever floats into my head! I don't have a set schedule of when I will post, at least once a week I think. But who knows, it could be more!
To those who have encouraged me to do this, thank you so much! I know I was a pain when it came to finding a name, but I think it worked out!
It has been two years since my last post, one about the passing of my Grandmother. That was one tough blog to write! (this is my old blog, if you want to read my old writings http://tonsoftuba.blogspot.com/).
That is all for today. Feeling icky from allergies, but had a good cardio session this morning. headed to the house for breakfast, and college football! And looking forward to the church fish fry tomorrow. Have a good weekend all!
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